Solas: No I didn't. I'd never have sex with you under false pretenses.
Inquisitor: Yeah, you didn't TAKE me---like you PROMISED, by the way---instead you TOOK ME IN. TOTALLY BAIT AND SWITCH.
Solas: I never promised to have sex with you.
Solas: Okay. Maybe... that MIGHT... have implied we were going off to have sex. But---
Inquisitor: And when we walk off screen, what happens? THIS:
Inquisitor: I think we're going for romance but instead you tell me something I valued IS CRAP and then BREAK UP WITH ME FOREVER. I mean, I know you're a Trickster God but that is some Fade-level deception right there.
Solas: I do have a beautiful voice, though.
Inquisitor: Yes. Yes, you do. You bastard.
Solas: So you're still going to romance me again on your next play-through, right?
So y'all already know I'm re-playing (for the umpteenth time) Dragon Age: Inquisition.
Whenever you begin a game, there are a few training quests you have to do, to familiarize the player with how everything works. One of these quests involves the quartermaster, Threnn.
Threnn is a Loghain supporter. In her dialogue, she talks about how Loghain was a hero---he didn't betray the Grey Wardens at Ostagar, he saved his own troops.
Me: No, no, no! That's not how that went!
Because, y'know, I played Dragon Age: Origins. I was there! But that's just one crazy bitch person. Doesn't matter. Shrug it off.
Then Solas gives us a "both sides" viewpoint on Ostagar.
Both sides are the truth??
Me: NO, SOLAS, YOU LYING SACK OF WEASELS, THAT'S NOT HOW TRUTH WORKS!!
Again, I was there. Loghain didn't withdraw his troops to save them. He withdrew his troops as part of his betrayal of the Grey Wardens.
This pet peeve has grown, and just become more irritated, over the years of my playing this game. (And maybe it's been exacerbated by the real-world war on facts and truth and both-sides-ism.)
ANYHOW.
One of the play-throughs I currently am running (yes, I said "one of," don't judge me, shut up), has Anora ruling alone as Queen of Ferelden, Alistair dead (or drunk), and Loghain as the Grey Warden who helped end the Fifth Blight.
Aside: Do you ever get that loading screen that says something like, "Experts disagree if the Fifth Blight was truly a Blight"?If you do, do you also yell, "It was SO a True Blight!" at the screen and feel personally offended?
So anyway, Loghain Mac Tir is my Warden. This means all-new cut-scenes for me, new dialogue. WHOOT!!!
Then suddenly, THIS:
You can imagine my surprise. After all this "Loghain was a hero" crap, LOGHAIN HIMSELF ADMITS HE BETRAYED THE GREY WARDENS.
And later in the Fade:
Loghain AGAIN admits his guilt in everything that happened to Ferelden in Dragon Age: Origins.
I'm like, YES!! FACTS ARE FACTS! IT IS POSSIBLE TO KNOW THE TRUTH! THANK YOU, LOGHAIN!
Loghain knowing he is guilty and having repented is kind of touching. It leads to Loghain getting the best send off as Person Chosen To Fight The Nightmare.
Is that beautiful and heroic or what? In his end is his beginning---once again a noble, self-sacrificing warrior. And most people would never hear this because, I'm thinking, for the majority of players, Loghain didn't survive Dragon Age: Origins.
As far as epic farewell lines go, the only other one that comes close is Sarcastic (Purple) Hawke's, "WHY IS IT ALWAYS SPIDERS?!!"
But getting back to Loghain, his being the best send-off is especially cemented by Varric speaking his epitaph:
I rest my case.
Also, if you're wondering what Varric is talking about when he refers to Loghain's early life, you need to read The Stolen Throne. Loghain was a hero before he became a villain. (The books also explain why Loghain hates Alistair, something poor Alistair doesn't even know.)
I just like this clip because of the truth of the lore. No one alive remembers the Deep Roads at their height, thus even the dwarves don't remember the dwarves.
I giggled when I heard the surgeon NPC say this. Surely someone, somewhere has used this as a smutty literature fanfic prompt? I just adore Bioware. (And Dragon Age.)
(Sorry it's so dark, but it's the words that are important.)
Recently I decided to replay Dragon Age: Inquisition and, amazingly, since I've played it through SOOOOO many times (over 20 and I stopped counting), I'm actually finding new cut-scenes.
For example, I never got this scene before, so thought I'd share in case anyone else was like me.
I generally don't get Vivienne's personal quest until late in the story, and apparently I never speak with her after Bastien dies, after the scene where she talks about funeral planning. I just go straight for the main story ending. I didn't realize Vivienne had more to say. And I thought she liked me....
Those of you who've followed me for a while know I used to post pet-centered interviews under the Cafe title, back on my old blog.
A few of those interviews were saved and appear on my website.
But I haven't done any more....UNTIL NOW. **trumpet fanfare**
Have you been listening to the audio version of Wicked Belovedand wondered, who is the exceedingly talented and sexy fella reading this? Wonder no longer!
Yes, today the Chatty Cat is privileged to present.... oh, who am I kidding.... Today the Chatty Cat is squeeeeeing like a teenaged fangirl on a half-crazed sugar high because our guest is the one and only:
ADAM HOWDEN
If you play video games at all, you'll be familiar with his work. He's all over: Dragon Age: Origins Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening Fable III Star Wars: The Old Republic as well as starring in: Lost Horizon (Fenton Paddock) Xenoblade Chronicles (Shulk) (English version) and The Adventures of Tintin: The Game (Tintin)
And he has acquired his own Estrogen Brigade from playing Anders in Dragon Age II.
On stage he starred as Malevole/Altofront in The Malcontent, plus he has guested in several television programs, like New Tricks.
Adam in The Malcontent
And, as I said, now he has narrated the audiobook version of Wicked Beloved. (Squee! Such a sexy voice!)
So, yes, right there my gaming and writing worlds collide.
Luckily I am a professional.
SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Ahem. Okay. Not that much of a professional. (major Twitter crush) Amazingly, because he is an extra-special, patient, and very, very nice person, he agreed to be interviewed by drooling fangirl me. So here we go:
Welcome to The Chatty Cat Cafe! First off, tea or coffee? How do you like it served? Tea, well brewed, milk, half teaspoon of sugar. The focus here is generally on pets and you’re famous for being a Kind Hearted Cat Lover. Please introduce us to your cats.
I have two black cats. They are called Frankie & Goose.
Frankie is very pretty (he's a bit of a girl). He wears a collar & has
white armpit hair. He's also a bit chubby. Goose is a bit more rough around the
edges, but still very handsome.
How did you come up with the names Frankie and Goose? I actually didn't have the honour of naming Frankie &
Goose. They were from a rescue centre. I think they'd already had several
owners before me & presumably one of them named them. They are from the
same litter though, brothers, so they've always had each other.
What are their favorite treats?
Goose likes treats. His favourites are these smelly
biscuits called Dreamies, but he's also partial to a bit of smoked salmon.
Frankie won't eat treats. Don't know why. He'd rather eat more than his fair
share of his normal dried food.
Favorite places for napping?
Goose likes to either sleep on my bed (especially when I've
just changed the sheets), or on rough surfaces like wicker baskets. Frankie
likes to sleep in enclosed spaces. Under duvets or in his little cat hut, which
is like a very small tent. They're both fond of the sofa too.
Which of your
characters/performances would you say best represents the ethos of each of your
cats and why?
Goose is like a character I played in a play called MARY
STUART called "The Earl of Leicester", who was Queen Elizabeth I’s
favourite at court. He behaves all smooth & cavalier & is a bit of a
user but really he's a bit insecure & needs love & reassurance.
Robert Dudley, Earl of Leicester. Historical Hottie.
Frankie is more like my character "Anders" who I
voiced in the video game DRAGON AGE 2. He's pretty loyal, loving & very determined (especially when he wants to get into a room when the door is closed
or under my duvet in the middle of the night) He appears to be a softy but he
sometimes goes absolutely crazy like he's possessed (like Anders). He's given
me some nasty bites & scratches before.
Anders in Dragon Age 2
Do you get nerves before performances? How do you relax?
I do get nervous before any performance whether it's stage,
screen or voice over. I just have to say to myself "you'll love it when
you're doing it so get on with it". You just have to dive in & at some
point the nerves subside & you start to enjoy the performance.
How do you warm up before performing?
To warm up I do vocal & physical exercise. The vocal involves lots of scales & I will sometimes sing songs. Also I do tongue twisters like repeating "Red Leather, Yellow Leather" & "I'm not pheasant plucker, I'm a pheasant plucker's son. And I'm only plucking
pheasants till the pheasant plucker comes." The latter one can sound quite
interesting if you mess it up.
I do loads of stretching for physical warm ups.
What's your favorite song to sing?
Songs I might sing to warm my voice up are
"Shimmer" by a band called FUEL, "Folding Stars" by BIFFY
CLYRO & "Friday I'm In Love" by THE CURE.
If life were a musical, what would be your theme song?
If life were a musical, my theme song would be "Hasa
Diga Eebowai" from THE BOOK OF MORMON. It's so funny & outrageous. I
love it.
You can act and you can sing - are you a triple threat? Can you dance?
I am possibly one of the worst dancers mankind has ever
known, so unfortunately I'm not that kind of "Triple Threat", no. I
probably have some comedy value though.
If you had complete
artistic control and money was no object, what play/movie/game/book/whatever
would you choose to star in and why?
If money was no object & I had full artistic control I would want to write, star & direct a movie about my mother's side of the family living in East Africa in the 1960's. I would play my grandfather. I've been told so many amazing stories of their time there & having visited there myself I want others to see what a beautiful place it is. It's all in my head, I just need to write the bugger ;)
I know you write
comedy sketches—are you working on anything currently? Is comedy your favorite
genre to write?
I'm hoping to film some more comedy sketches soon. It's hard because you're often depending on other people's availability & there's no budget. But I do it because it's fun. I like writing & performing comedy because I am very childish.
How was recording an audiobook different from recording for games and
adverts?
Recording an audiobook takes a lot more time than games or adverts. So it takes a lot of patience on both my part & the sound engineer. You know you're going to be sat at a mic for hours reading aloud, which is not something we tend to do much of in the 21st century, so it's
important to try to be as relaxed as possible. Don't get angry at yourself when
you cock-up & try to be as prepared as possible.
And lastly, getting back to the pet theme I wandered away from, do you have any advice for someone thinking of getting a cat?
My advice to anyone thinking of getting a cat is to get one from a rescue centre. The chances are it'll be much more fun & intelligent than some inbred pedigree breed & you won't have to worry that people are going to steal it. Also, the rescue centre will have had it health checked, neutered & micro-chipped. There is no need to spend hundreds of pounds for a cat. You can get yourself a wonderful bundle of fluff for the cost of a small donation to the rescue centre.
Here are Ken Levine (Bioshock), Chris Avellone (Fallout: New Vegas), and David Gaider (Dragon Age) speaking about the importance of writing, plot, and game mechanics.
