The Ballad of Darien Gautier

Long, long ago, when Elder Scrolls Online first appeared (2014), I fell in love with a character named Darien Gautier.

(Darien is voiced by Jon Curry, of Zevran Arainai fame (he's also the American-accented Inquisitor in Dragon Age: Inquisition, and you've probably heard his voice in a bunch of other BioWare and Bethesda games). So if you easily fall in love with voices, like me, you know where I'm coming from here.)

And---miracle of miracles---he fell in love with me!!!

(YES, although Zenimax won't let you flirt with ANYBODY ELSE, you CAN flirt with Darien. Bless the person who made this possible by working in some flirt dialogue choices. You are my hero.)

So when y'all are about to go up against the huge, final boss, you can get dialogue like this:

(happy sigh)

And you get dialogue about what we're going to do when the fight is over:

As the "beautiful hero of Coldharbour," I was definitely looking forward to a drink and a neck massage. And there was no reason to expect I wouldn't get it. From the moment we became a couple, Darien had been saying we'd be together, that we'd find each other after the battle, no matter what:

So my character is quite invested in this relationship. As well as saving the world, of course. Y'know. That, too.

*big, dramatic boss fight*  *yay victory*

And then.....

DARIEN DIED.

*sobbing*

Except we couldn't find his body so THERE WAS HOPE.

I played all the different sides of the ESO conflict, and I waited.

2015
One day, I was reading all the books in Orsinium, because that is something I do. (There is Important Lore to be found. Shut up.)

ANYWAY,  in the library of the Temple of Ire, I came across this:

Me: *high pitched dolphin shrieks* THIS IS DARIEN ISN'T IT IT'S GOT TO BE DARIEN OMG

*turns over page*

Me: *more high pitched dolphin shrieks*  IT DARIEN!!!

I told everybody on Twitter. Darien was trying to come back to me.

And I kept the faith.

2016
I wander into a Mages' Guild library in Anvil, and there is fellow Darien fangirl Gabrielle Benele, looking for Darien. I'm all like, "I HAVE A CLUE FOR THIS!!!"

So it's not just me. A Darien rescue could be on the cards.

And since then I've been waiting.

Waiting.

2018
In 2018 came the release of ESO Summerset. I was really hoping I'd learn more about Razum-dar, the charismatic Khajiit. Maybe even be able to flirt with him!

But no.

Nope.

Raz is present, but there's very little personal interaction.

And then I heard the Golden Knight's voice and I was like.... Is that...??!!

IS THAT...??!!

Meridia herself confirms that, YES, THE MYSTERY IS FINALLY SOLVED.

Now, you can see by this timeline that Zenimax Online has been playing a very long game here. Respect. I'm disappointed I still cannot flirt with Razum-dar, but RESPECT for remembering that there are Darien fangirls awaiting Darien's return. And for giving us some love:

It was truly nice to interact with him again.

So I did NOT expect him TO DIE AGAIN.

Even though it's been long enough that none of this should be "spoilers," I'll skip over exactly HOW he dies and just mention the important bit:  THIS TIME THERE WILL BE NO BODY. 

I'm like, NO. YOU CANNOT DO ME LIKE THIS, ZENIMAX.

So I hold out hope that somehow Meridia will give him back to me.

Then, at the end of Summerset, I hear a mysterious book has teleported to the victory celebration.

IT'S DARIEN I KNOW IT'S DARIEN

You may want to mute the sound on this clip as you read. That's Rigurt's laughter in the background.
(I adore Rigurt the Brash, it was so cool to meet him again, though his maniacal laughter can be unsettling in this context. The context of IMMA STAB THAT DAEDRIC BITCH.)

All I can say is this better not be the end of Darien Gautier.

Bethesda has announced the upcoming release of ESO ELSWEYR in June 2019. I have wanted to visit Elsweyr since Oblivion (2006) so, yeah, I'm gonna be there.

And my two greatest hopes for this expansion are:

1) I GET TO SHIV MERIDIA. IN THE FACE. TAKE THAT, GLISTER WITCH. GIVE ME MY DARIEN BACK.

2) I get to flirt with some Khajiit. Preferably Razum-dar. But, hey. ANY flirting would be nice.

Because, on that second point, I don't understand why I can wander the open world killing everything in sight, but I can't flirt with anyone. WTF, Zenimax Online/Bethesda?? What's up with that??

I mean, there are tons of games on the market where I can kill things. And some days, that's all I want. Give me a bow and point me toward the draugr.

But what makes an RPG game like Elder Scrolls endure, what makes it re-play-able, what gives it legs and positive word of mouth, is Emotional Investment. I want to care about the characters and the storyline. Throw in some flirting/personal stuff so I can pretend it's not just a linear path, it's something I chose, and thus I affected the world, or our little corner of it.

Let me have my Darien.